This would be a vague entry.
Life is truly, truly unpredictable. A morning seemingly filled with predictability suddenly decides to fling you into a whirlwind of bewilderment and distress.
I'm encased in my protected shell of a world. One brief insight into another renders me almost helpless.
Could I call myself blessed? Or would I be considered spoilt? Or just spoiled by my blessings?
I can barely comprehend the prospect of losing someone you love so much.
In a matter of a few agonizing hours could I have matured a little more? Did I fully learn the importance of appreciating your "water before the well runs dry"? Was it really a silver lining in a cloud?
Gosh. That was one hell of a cloud then.
What if the node in the pancreas was really not benign?
What if circumstances were different?
I couldn't begin to question myself. Adding a few more years to your age, learning a little bit more than you should, making realizations you really hope are false.
Sometimes ignorance truly is bliss.
There are loads of kids having to bear more than I have to. A parent already lost, a family incomplete, or one with financial issues I might not be able to understand.
For once I am drained of anger. It's almost funny, but the issues with stupid people have suddenly faded into oblivion.
No, it wouldn't matter if they carried on with what they did, that is, being stupid and existing.
A teensy bit of attempted humor in a situation fully lacking. So sue me.
Well, it would be selfish to call myself weary, tired might be a tad more appropriate.
Thank the Lord.
I'm still blessed.
And to the only one who was really there for me to confide in and to talk to, thanks baby. We sure have had our share of shit, huh.
Disregard the grammar mistakes if there were any, I just hope you caught the gist of the entry.
For those who don't understand what's going on though, it's what this blog's all about.
Publicly esoteric.